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jochannon

Just doin' what I do
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Literature

Piotr's Misadventure (commission)

Piotr walks alone through the fire station alone - normally, of course, the fire station would be filled with the entire on-duty company, but today they've all been placed off-duty. Piotr walks quickly through the eerily-quiet building; he is tall, over six feet tall, with a strong, proud jaw, the tall firefighter's body is broad and thick with muscle, his golden blond hair is cut short, his pale blue eyes twinkling above a cheery smile as he hurries to get his errand done - the rest of the company is out partying at the local bar, and Piotr would normally be there with them right now, but he came back to the stations to get something, which is why he is there walking through the darkening empty station as the evening descends into a thick night. Piotr is in a hurry, and a little caught up in his anticipation of a good night out, so as he hurries through the station he fails to notice a few small details - some wires a re disconnected, and the door to the chapel is slightly ajar.

All

1775 deviations
Literature

Points for Art

I have decided that I like to give away Premium Memberships; so I've opened a donation pool to collect points to give a premium membership to a friend; once it is full, I'll give a membership, then I'll star all over again. I'll write a poem or a story for anyone who donates on whatever subject they like, with whatever characters they like. Stories: No politics please; I'll do porn, but no snuff or pedophilia; I'm not much good at gore or horror, but I'm willing to make a go of it; I'm best at Fantasy and Science Fiction; Romance, okay. Poetry: Free-form or any style; I don't have much experience with Haiku, but I'll try if you want; I'v

Featured

19 deviations
Literature

Excerpt from NaNoWriMo Novel

The sun was just beginning to rise when Lyn climbed to the top of the cliff above the town. He was a compact man, with sunken grey-blue eyes and flyaway golden hair worn in long dreadlocks. Lyn and his three brothers had joined the army of the king of Hightower to escape the poverty of their homeland of Kodenst, one of the poorer kingdoms on the far side of the Sindonal mountains from Lochshore. They had been together, through thick and thin, for all their lives. They had fought together to survive the civil war in Kodenst, then trekked through the mountains together to reach Hightower, where it was said that a man who knew to fight cou

Story Previews

5 deviations
Literature

Piotr's Misadventure (commission)

Piotr walks alone through the fire station alone - normally, of course, the fire station would be filled with the entire on-duty company, but today they've all been placed off-duty. Piotr walks quickly through the eerily-quiet building; he is tall, over six feet tall, with a strong, proud jaw, the tall firefighter's body is broad and thick with muscle, his golden blond hair is cut short, his pale blue eyes twinkling above a cheery smile as he hurries to get his errand done - the rest of the company is out partying at the local bar, and Piotr would normally be there with them right now, but he came back to the stations to get something, which is why he is there walking through the darkening empty station as the evening descends into a thick night. Piotr is in a hurry, and a little caught up in his anticipation of a good night out, so as he hurries through the station he fails to notice a few small details - some wires a re disconnected, and the door to the chapel is slightly ajar.

Commissions

11 deviations
Eve

The Adventures of Lurk

14 deviations
Literature

A Year Ago

Amy sat upon a low stone wall, listening to the soft sounds of the empty park: the soft breeze whistled, the leaves of the trees rustled like surf while birds fluttered about, whistling to each other in the early-morning calm. Beyond the park, the city stirred as the sun rose higher into the sky, but here, all was quiet. The breeze stirred Amy's long back hair as she leaned forward and lit a candle. She clutched her black shawl about her, and took out the black rose. She stared at it for a moment, then laid it beside the candle; it had been a year ago that her Josh, her love, had died on this very spot. She closed her eyes, and for a

My stories

40 deviations
Literature

Marathag: our new home

Two men, a Human, and an Eldar stood facing each other unblinking; the one, a heretic soldier of the Imperium of Man, the other, an exiled warrior, now in an unexpected position of authority. Karlees Navarre smiled at his opposite number. “let me give you one piece of advice.” He said. “If there's one thing I've learned in this job, it's this: it doesn't matter how many of your enemies you kill; there will always be more. What matters is that when the fighting stops, the people you are fighting to defend are still alive.” Ariel Ysggad scoffed; what did this Mon-Keigh think he could teach an Eldar of war? Navarre smiled

Warhammer- WH40k Fanart

11 deviations
Literature

Headline Fails

Two days ago, two Palestinian Arabs walked into a Jerusalem Synagogue armed with a pistol and axes and started killing people; they killed four people and injured six more four critically, before the police shot them dead; a Druze policeman was also critically injured in the shootout and later died of his wounds. Let's take a quick look at some of the immediate reporting from the world's fair and unbiased media: The BBC wrote: 'Jerusalem synagogue attack kills four Israelis' Apparently mentioning that it was Palestinians who did it would be so gauche. But wait, maybe I'm being unfair; let's take a look at how they reported the actual stor

Political Cartoons

25 deviations
Literature

September 11

I remember; I remember.

Poetry

21 deviations
Literature

Quote of the day 67

Alien sky gods, Atlantis, Bigfoot, Yeti, the Abominable Snowman, Kraken, Lemuria, the Loch Ness Monster, merfolk, dragons, the Flying Dutchman. . . In all my 21 long years, I've never seen any conclusive evidence any of these things do not exist. Nor Fairies, Elfs, pixies, el Dorado, the bunyip,(thanks to Bookishgirl for suggesting them) Unicorns (thanks Raindrp, and I already got Merfolk). . . Nor Leprechauns, the Phoenix, ghosts, or the honest politician; The Jackelope, the Roc(the bird, not the wrestler), the Devil Dog, angels, werebeasts of any kind... Goblins, Kobolds, Dwarves, ESP, sorcery, witchcraft, el Chupacabra(sp?), Dryads, N

Quotes of the day

736 deviations
Literature

Quotes of the Day, Series 3

Some people, at least, have enjoyed my Quotes of the Day, so here's all of Series 3, for your amusement and bemusement, added to as it goes on. My quotes by the way; nobody else's. These are my thoughts and observations on the world around us: funny, sad, uplifting, evocative, inspiring, silly, and occasionally just plain stupid, they are all here for your perusal: enjoy!

Quotes of the Day, Series 3

370 deviations
Literature

Quote of the Day, Series 4: 88

Some treasure maps are for real.

Quotes of the Day, series 4

91 deviations
Misa Hanataki

Trades, Fanart, and Contest Entries

18 deviations

Good Quotes

13 deviations
Literature

Ballad of John Thomas WH40K

The Ballad of John Thomas tells the story of Sergeant John Thomas of the 2nd, then 1st Varraconi Regiment, who gained renown fighting the enemies of humanity, most notably the traitor Marines of Toran the Murderer on the world of Kommanche; after the Viger system was taken by the traitor forces, John Thomas rallied a group of survivors to keep on fighting a guerrilla war from within Kommanche's hives: despite many attempts to destroy them,  Thomas' group survived until a force under [[Karlees Navarre]] liberated Kommanche and retiik the Viger system. The song is in the style of the 'Chain Gang' songs of Kommanche's serf-laborers, and has a d

Songs and Music

6 deviations
Literature

The murder of Charles Fryatt

THE MURDER OF CHARLES FRYATT Charles Algernon Fryatt, born December 2, 1872, was a British mariner, father of seven children, who was brutally murdered by the Germans in an act of deliberate terrorism aimed at the British merchant marine. Birn in Southampton, he and his wife, Ethel, had seven children; six girls and one boy. The children were Olive, Victoria, Doris, Vera, Mabel, Charles and Dorothy. The younger Charles later followed his father into the merchant navy; after graduating from school, Fryatt entered the Mercantile Marine, serving on a number of ships before joining the Great Eastern Railway as a seaman in 1892 aboard the SS Ips

Articles

87 deviations
Comic end.

Comic Colonel Tye

5 deviations
My dog in a lap.

Deviant ID

2 deviations
An apple press

Stuff I made

2 deviations
Literature

Gunslinger 1: I'm Gunslinger

You probably have heard of me: the cops are after me because I'm a vigilante, the papers are after me because I'm a great story, and the criminals are after me because I'm a danger to them: I'm Gunslinger. # The weary sun slowly dropped below the horizon, it's dirty light hung on, held by the poisonous clouds that hung over the filthy and disease-infested city, while beneath it's uncaring light, murderers, rapists, and thieves went about their evil work, the vast city uncaring for the helpless cries of their victims. Just another day in New York. # I have no super powers. I am not really fast; I have no psychic ability, I cannot perfo

Gunslinger

44 deviations
Literature

The Challengers 14: Foreshadowing

Casmar City stretches across only a few square miles but it holds over one million souls, all of whom are owned by Senor Rodrigo. There is no 'tax' but there isn't a business he doesn't hold a piece of, no rent paid he doesn't take a cut from: the bare minimum of police and social services are maintained for the benefit of international observers, but in the choked slum of Casmar City drugs, guns, stolen goods, and even people are bought and sold: the only law is that of the jungle, and of Senor Rodrigo. # On the highest floor in the tallest tower in the city there stood an immaculately-dressed man; he stood before a wall of floor-to-ceilin

Super Heroes

36 deviations
Literature

Quest World: Index

Introduction I am of the firm opinion that the whole point of playing a game is to have fun. Which is why I do not enjoy D&D very much; the system seems unnecessarily complicated, the rules weirdly strict, and the logic bizarre: you spend almost as much time figuring out how to do an action than actually playing the game! So I'm making this RPG(named at last); not a set of rules for every occasion, rather a simple set of guidelines you can use to play a fun quick game. Feel free to modify anything you don't like; invent house rules; do whatever you want, just so long as you have fun doing it. Do whatever you want, that is, but sell it: you

RPG

18 deviations
I have no idea who she is

Drawings

22 deviations
Literature

List of Insults

One of the hard parts about writing for me is coming up with good insults for my characters to say. So here I'm sharing some of my good ones for people to use: "Take my advice: it is better to keep your mouth shut and have us all think you're an idiot, than to open your mouth and have us all know it." "I've heard better jokes from a guy reading the dictionary aloud." "You are the sort of idiot asshole who tailgates on an empty highway!" "I'd call you an idiot, except I have friends who are idiots and I'm trying to insult you. Not them." "You. Are Stupid! And let me explain to you what I mean by 'Stupid' with the emphasis on the first syl

Freeware

14 deviations
Literature

Today, in 1865

Today, in 1865, the 13th Amendment to the United States Constitution was passed by the United States Congress, abolishing slavery in the United States.

Stuff

36 deviations
Stock Artist  Directory: V

Stock Art Directory

26 deviations
Stock Artist  Directory: Z

Scraps

27 deviations